Fathers who are sick or troubled have a difficult time being a good father, simply because they may be unable to.
A sick father may consider nice things they would like to do for their children, but they may be bedridden, or disabled in a way, which makes physical movement not possible, or their movement is very slow. They can however be a stable presence by talking with their children, and giving advice. They can make suggestions to the child as to how they should live, and help with crucial decisions. They can still teach their offspring about life.
A temporary sickness, that the father quickly recovers should be viewed as a second chance, or another lease of life where the dreams of a fulfilling relationship between father and child can be realised. It is extremely painful though when death occurs suddenly and the family did not have time to make things right. Beware of missed opportunities and make each others life better while you still have time. Missed Opportunities can give a lifetime of recurring feelings of guilt and regret.
A troubled father may have insurmountable problems, that they just cannot think straight. They may be consumed with their difficulties, and can see nothing else before them. They may feel that no one can help their situation.
A troubled father typically does not want to share their problems, and pull people down. So they bottle up their problems, and literally turn to the bottle ie alcohol, or drugs. They may self-destruct for no apparent reason, for there is turmoil going on in their minds.
It may take take a counsellor or therapist to make inroads into the phsychie, or a long talk with someone who cares also helps. A long talk with a former partner can help, for that person knows the father more than others. A long and frank heart to heart with a child can also work wonders – particularly if there is understanding and forgiveness show at the end of a shouting match and tears.
We all go through stuff in our life. We have periods of calm, and periods of stressed. A new challenge is always around the corner. We have all said and done things that we should not. Being able to let go and free oneself of guilt and regret involves a time of reflection and restoration.
A troubled father needs to have a support network. This may be friends or family. It may be a church, temple, mosque or other religious grouping. It could be a club or lodge. It could even be the comraderie of work colleagues. Fellowship with others helps to lift one out of the doldrums. A lonely person can wallow in self-pity and go around in a vicious circle of despair and regret.
Some issues with a troubled father cannot be solved with friendship and love. They may need medical help, with prescribed drugs and vitamin supplements. Vitamin B12 helps the brain. A strict healthy diet and exercise regime can also help to gently turn things around.
Always talk about past good times, and perhaps laugh over disasters. These disasters have provided variety and adventures in your life and should not always be looked at as negative. Your experience can help someone else.
Never Give up on a sick or troubled Father. Life is too short. Sneak in some enjoyable moments that will serve as lasting happy memories. Life is what you make it. Make up a list of things that Dad would like, and make them happen. Give gifts they would like. Spend time with them. Take them out. Even watch a TV programme with them. Quality Time lost cannot be returned.